Don’t we love to talk

As people we love to talk, we love to socialise and network. Dale Carnegie had a great quote: -

“You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.”

I suppose your wondering where I’m going with all this? Well it’s the “why” we as a species like to talk and network or dare I say it, “Gossip.”

Gossip can be a very good vehicle for moving a story on, or for-shadowing a future event. Two characters discussing another character is very helpful when you need an aspect of their personality for-shadowed.

So to understand Gossip we need to know why we do it in the first place.

We can express ourselves through the arts, I.e., music, religion, writing, politics, and even science. But what do we talk about most of the time? It’s not the above list I’m sure. I have read that two-thirds of all human conversation is gossip. This may come as an unwelcome reminder of our interest in the personal lives of others. But if you think about it most gossip is not negative. Most is just chitchat about who is having a baby or what colour someone’s going to paint the lounge. Whatever the moral status, gossip serves an important evolutionary purpose. It’s like a verbal grooming, ape’s pick each others flea’s and stroke each others fur. As for our social grooming, we talk and gossip.

The term gossip once meant, "A person related to one in God, The word later came to mean a close (female) friend or companion. This later translated into the modern definition of gossip, "small talk, and rumour" or "to talk about the affairs of others," I like this one.

Somewhere along the line of our evolution, we evolved the capacity for language; gossip replaced our physical social grooming. According to Robin Dunbar, a professor at the University of Liverpool and a leading researcher on human gossip, “language evolved specifically for the purpose of gossip.” It functions to make a bond within your social group, It can resolve conflicts, build social networks, clarifying social status, also it can help to influence others. Gossip is therefore a powerful way of strengthening the social bonds we already have.

Stated by Kate Fox, "Gossip generally involves more than the sharing of information about people's lives and relationships: it usually involves the expression of opinions or feelings about this information." Although opinions may not be directly stated, they may be heavily implied through tone of voice or body language. It shows their views on the subject matter. It’s not necessarily negative. However, this is not to say that negative views do not exist, as they definitely do; and these negative comments serve a very important function.

When someone engages in negative gossip with a trustworthy person they are strengthening the social bond with that person.

Although other animals have mating calls and grunts, only the human species uses language to such a degree. Gossip is what humans use to establish and maintain relationships, resolve conflicts, build social networks, influence others. Gossip undoubtedly works as a social mechanism. So when someone asks if you’re gossiping, answer with a big fat “YES”. As, we are all very good at it.

The Sun, how it changes my day.

I walk with my wife, the sun breaks through the clouds. I feel warm, I feel happy.

There's a definite change in women when this happens. In the winter months, when it's cloudy, it's raining, there's drizzle and it feels miserable. Oh and not to forget it's wet and damp. Well women cover up, they have there hats on, umbrellas sprung open and big coats covering from chin to toes.

We don't really see them. We just don't notice them. They become part of the grey back ground.

So as soon as that sun comes out my wife and women change, they evolve like a butterfly, they will go from this covered up form, kin to a nun and transform into a beautiful glowing sun filled person, full of life with the embodiment of all things nice. They really do entice us all, my male friends pretty much say the same thing, we all notice. With the first bit of sun the first thing a man notices is his partner or wife. It Isn't the sun its self. We love the sun only because women are gorgeous in its light. I'm including my wife, as she is very gorgeous. She does the same, see changes, see becomes vibrant and colourful, there is a little bit of flesh that shows after being coved up for the winter months. The skirts, the makeup, and then "the smile".

This is the most important of all the changes, the smile comes on most faces. I drive round the streets or I walk round the town centres, I go for walks at the weekends. If the suns out with blue sky's and fluffy clouds then people smile, men are smiling just as much as woman. I like to think that I smile more in the summer too.
So I think this post is a testament to all women. To say thank you for uplifting my day and most other men's day too. I don't think you realise what impact you have on us, us men of the world.

Thank you sun and thank you women of the world, most of all thank you, my wife.

The picture I used today was taken by James Heathcote, find more of his work at www.jamesheathcote.com

Summer Holidays

Some unfortunate souls, (like me) have been on holiday for a week or if your lucky two, and the prospect of leaving the sunny beach location behind, well spells out doom and gloom. I'm about to swap flip flops and shorts for toe protector boots and a blue uniform, and instead of looking out towards the horizon on the beach front, I’ll be staring at parts and components for at least 8 hours.

It's strange because normally I'm quite looking forward to getting back home by now, but as I write this on the eve of my return, I feel I would quite happily stay here for another week or even two. If not for the obligations I have back home, ( like work and house and bills) I might just extend this to a more permanent arrangement. I mean why not? Others live at holiday resorts and look very happy doing so. Could I move here or somewhere like this? If your wondering I'm in Cornwall which is the very south of the UK.

rolling hills, deep valleys and long stretches of sandy beaches. When the sun is shining and the sky is blue Cornwall is as beautiful as anywhere on earth.

The dream of a writer as I understand it is to be able to write where and whenever they like. Preferable from some window through which inspiration will flow over you like a child's smile after handing them their most favourite ice-cream.

We can dream and wish and if we are really lucky, (not to mention hard working) we may reach such goals whether it be Cornwall are your very own most loved of places. To reach high will at least get you somewhere better than you are know.